All I lost for Christmas was two teeth

On Saturday, Christmas Eve while I was at the office I got a text from Bill.

Ellie lost a tooth.
Eating soup.

Well, that's a head-scratcher, huh?  Only my girl could lose teeth while eating soup!  And then another text about 15 minutes later.

She lost another tooth.

At that point I began to worry. Was something happening to cause teeth to fall out of her mouth?  Wait, was this a joke?  No, they wouldn't do that to me and make me worry when I couldn't see them.

No, they weren't kidding.  Two of her baby teeth on the bottom left side were ready to call it a day.  So this has created a bit of a gap with two missing.  It's been two days since she lost them and she hasn't mentioned them since.  Appears she has adjusted just fine to the space of two missing teeth side-by-side!

Pictured above is Ellie wearing her 'favorite' Christmas gift and her hair down.  What a doll, huh?

Congratulations, you're a Godmother!

Define Godmother.

Although you may not believe it, I've never been a Godmother before.  An aunt, older sister, mentor, and friend to another's child, yes.  But never a Godmother.

Yet another miracle.  Just this week I became a Godmother to Izzy.  She's pictured here with my Christmas gift.  Apparently I do a decent job with feline gifts too, as she played with it for the first hour out of it's package.  Izzy is not new to my gifts.  She's received a Christmas present for the past three years.  Truth be told, hers was the very first gift that I bought this year!  I should have known good things were to come!

Izzy is the cat of a friend at work who will be out of town between Christmas and New Year's week.  I will be taking care of her.  Being the scaredy-cat she is, I'll be visiting her daily in her current home to ensure she has what she needs.

This will not be a first cat-sitting role for me.  While I lived in Saratoga, my friend Janice and her husband bestowed upon my this role.  Their cat was older and needed daily medication.  She also stayed in her familiar surroundings and I checked on her daily.  That worked out just fine, and I'm sure this will too.

As I ease into this Godmother role, I'm sure there will be more photos to share.  Maybe even one of the two of us together.  That is, if I'm able to get her out from under the couch during my daily visits!

Christmas Miracles abound

As this Christmas season winds down on Christmas night, I recall the wonderful memories we've created.  The love, the kindness and peace I feel as a result of so many amazing people who have touched my life differently this season.

The miracles that were created have changed me.  I'm grateful for that experience and will move forward realizing the impact one person may have on another is profound.  Let's look for miracles year round - there has to be a place for that!

Today we celebrated Christmas.  Presents, phone calls, warm wishes and festive food were central to our day.  We had temperatures in the 70's so we spent the day in shorts rather than flannel pants.  Which made great weather to grill the beef tenderloin outside before finishing in the oven.  It was laid back and restful.  Several naps were taken.

To cap off this season I'm sharing the most recent miracles, which came by way of Christmas cards from two former members of my team.  Although we no longer have a direct reporting relationship, we stay close by meeting for lunch or coffee in a mentoring arrangement.  I'm so grateful for these two ladies.  They make being a leader much easier.


"Merry Christmas to you and your family!  You are a gift and blessing to my life.  Thank you! I would not have gotten through this year and supported so much without you.  May God bless you during this time of miracles."

and ....

"Dear Jude:  You have no idea how grateful I am to have you in my life.  Thank you so much for being such a wonderful person and ex-boss.  Thank you as well for sharing your amazing stories with me.  I have learned so much from you.  You are a role model.  I wish you a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year and may God continue to bless you and your beautiful family."

Wow, those were incredible reads, and so powerful.  Sometimes we need those reminders that we make a difference in ways we're not even aware of ...

Christmas miracles come to a wonderful close.

'Twas the night before Christmas

On Christmas Eve we ate, laughed and awaited the arrival of .... no, we did not!  Although Ellie provided us an update on Santa's whereabouts throughout the night by using the Santa Tracker App, we did not await the arrival of Santa.  No milk and cookies left out, no note for Santa to read and no color coded wrapping paper to ensure we knew which gifts where from us and which from Santa.

This was a wonderfully peaceful Christmas Eve.  We had pasta for dinner and created a new family tradition of chocolate fondue for dessert.  Such a sweet treat that is rarely thought about here.  We watched It's a Wonderful Life and Family Man before those visions of sugarplums danced in our heads.

Merry Christmas to all.  And to all a good night!

The most wonderful time of the year

It hasn't taken Christmas time to remind me to tell people how important they are to me.  Although it creates a wonderful opportunity for you to you cast your net widely to ensure they know.  This Christmas season began very differently as I approached it from a whole new perspective.

Many times the decorations and music start just after Halloween and with the hustle and bustle the festivity turns to frustration and Christmas spirit slips away weeks before the actual day.  Not this year.  This year would be different.

Perhaps it was the month of miracles journey that I set out to find beginning December first.  Perhaps it was the absence of Santa in the story we told.  It could have even been the focus on Advent each evening where the three of us gathered on the couch to hear Ellie read a story from her Advent book. Or the scripture reading from my grown-up Advent book before the door on the calendar was opened.

It could be the miracles that I found along the way.  The miracles I created for others.  Honestly, I believe it's been a combination of all of the above.

Sometimes when we set out on a journey, we're not sure what we'll find.  We may stumble and fall along the way.  And as we know it's not always about 'getting there', its what happens along the way that changes us.

This season has provided an amazing opportunity to let those around me know how important they are to me.  It may have been through a small gesture or a gift.  It may have been a card, a phone call or just taking the time to hear their story.  For me it was about recognizing who each of them really are - inside - where it matters.  And meeting them there.

I met a friend for lunch on Friday.  Who would have thought on the 23rd of December - the Friday before the holiday that our calendars would be open AND we'd be working!  Somehow we both were.  She's an incredibly sweet woman from Louisiana who moved to Dallas at the same time we did.  She's always been an encouraging voice and wonderful cheerleader during my journey here in Texas.

Friday was different.  She'd lost her Christmas spirit.  She shared her story of disappointment and discouragement.  I listened.  Realizing it wasn't my time to lean on her, I offered her a story of miracles and a promise of hope.

If you've ever watched someone's spirit lifted before you, it's a miracle in and of itself.  Her mood lightened and her face brightened.  I saw the load she'd been carrying become lighter.  And I heard the words that mean more to me than most, "I'm so proud of you!" she said.  Our friendship my gift.  One I treasure.  And my miracle for the Friday before Christmas.

Peace, love and friendship to you.

Healing from pain

I received a phone call yesterday at work about 10:30am from Ellie's daycare.  Miss Ashlie called to say she didn't want to alarm me yet during a game of tag, one of the other students punched Ellie in the face.  With a gasp, I sat back and listened.

This boy who has autism was playing along and then chose Ellie to punch when he didn't like the game anymore.  She cried, and he had been sent home for the day.  Miss Ashlie explained it broke her heart to have to call and tell me that my sweet Ellie had been hurt.  I asked if there was any blood, or anything broken.  No, neither.  They didn't anticipate even a black eye since it was more to the cheek than the eye or nose.

Breathe.

I asked how Ellie was doing now.  She explained she'd been upfront at the desk with several of the teachers so they could love on her, help her with an ice pack and ensure she was okay.  I thanked her for that.  I told Miss Ashlie that I'd ask to speak to Ellie if I didn't think she'd get upset all over again. And that I trusted she was in good hands.  If anything changed or Ellie wanted to be picked up to please call me. Since Ellie had her phone with her I asked if it would be okay if Ellie wanted to call me at some point today would they allow her.  Of course, she told me.  We love our sweet Ellie, we want her to feel safe.

One last question.  I asked if Ellie had retaliated.  "OH, goodness no!  She cried, but never lashed out."  For that I was very glad.

When I left work at 4pm to pick up Ellie I anticipated tears.  But there were none.  She was subdued, but that could be the tickle in her throat and the stuffy nose.  When we got to the car I asked if she was okay.  Did she want to talk about it.  She told me, "Mommy, there's nothing to talk about."

Hmmm.  Okay.

When we stopped at Kroger to pick up a few things she shared, "he didn't mean it Mommy.  He is autistic and the game must have been too much for him.  Maybe he was startled."

Just like the Grinch who stole Christmas, my heart grew three sizes bigger.  How very proud I was of this amazing girl.  Instead of feeling like the victim, she chose to forgive and understand this young boy's perspective.  Tears ran down my face in the dairy section as I pulled her close.  I told her how proud of her I was, and how amazing it was to see what a beautiful heart she has.  She never complained, she only said I'm sorry he didn't understand the game.

When I kissed the top of her head goodbye this morning I told her, 'Baby girl, keep showing the whole world that beautiful heart through your smile, through your kind words.  We need more people who show up like you do.  I love you!"

And of course she said, "okay Mommy, I will.  I love you too."

So, so proud!

Two Miracle Tuesday

Most days I'm grateful to have found one miracle.  Yesterday there were two.

Remember these miracles are all what you make of them - you get to decide.  So when my phone rang on Tuesday and my 'soul sister' friend, Monica was on the line I knew that was a miracle!

We've exchanged notes, gifts, texts and emails in the past several months - but a phone call!  This was a real treat!  We've decided that 2017 is going to be our year!  We need a girls' getaway at some point .. and today when I saw a course offered in Dallas in mid-February I invited her to come celebrate Valentine's Day here!  Bring the family and we'll all share the love!  She immediately went to work on figuring out a way to make that happen!

Miracle number one.

Later in the day at the grocery store after work, Ellie and I plodded up and down the aisles trying to remember what was on the list - as it sat on the counter at home in the kitchen.  We seemed to remember most of what we needed.  When we got to the peanut butter and jelly aisle I said, "El, let me just look and see if they have it."  She responded, "Mommy, they never have it!"  Yet there it was!

For the better part of a month we have been looking for Smucker's seedless raspberry jam.  Seems easy enough, right?  Wrong!  I always have a back-up in the pantry and yet the back-up has been long gone too!

Two beautiful glass jars waiting to be claimed.

Miracle number two.

Couldn't be more proud

There she is.  This amazing, gorgeous, kind, smart, funny, all grown-up 5th grader!  Wow!  She is currently on Winter Break enjoying a week at Children's Lighthouse with all the other kids this week.  Yesterday when I picked her up, Ms. Ashley told me what a big helper she was yesterday with all the little kids!  She had them all playing Simon Says - listening and playing along!  She sure does love those little kids.  If you don't see an education career in her future, I don't know what else there might be!

We know that in order to have as many choices as possible - college, career, etc.  We've emphasized the importance of working hard, studying and making a difference along the way.

Here are her end of semester grades for Draper Intermediate School.

English   -  96
Advanced Math  -  89
Advanced Science  - 93
Social Studies   - 93
Art  - Pass
Music - Pass
Choral Music - Pass
College & Career - Pass
Digital Citizenship - Pass
P.E. - Pass

What an amazing array of grades for this amazing student!  We celebrated all the hard work (and homework) that led her to these results!

Its all about the lights

Is there nothing more beautiful than the lights of Christmas?  This gorgeous light display is in a park in Dallas surrounding water, shopping and an array of food trucks.  This is the spot we enjoyed after our dinner with Jeanine and Michael the other night.  The trees are gorgeous, and the reflection in the water is the icing on top!

Ellie's Girl Day with Miss Jeanine

Miss Jeanine treated Ellie to a special Christmas Saturday with her this weekend.  We met her at 1pm at the nail salon in McKinney.  There just the two of them enjoyed manicures and pedicures with lots of sparkle!

Bill and I ran some errands and prepared for the transition from 70 degree temps during the day, to the 30's we were expecting in the evening.  We had a quick bowl of Lobster Bisque, split some amazing warm flatbreads.  After a few more stops we met up with Jeanine, Michael and Ellie at Hopdoddy in Addison for dinner and to go to the park for the Christmas Lights.

Check out those gorgeous nails.  Finally someone proved the worth of filing nails to Ellie!  She love's the shape and requested the French Manicure by name!  Her toes are a bright pink with sparkles as well.
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Girl time!

Ellie and I spent time on Saturday morning getting a few last minute errands done.  We put on our Christmas music and big smiles before we went out into the day.  We found lots of people had done the same!

The line in the post office, as anticipated, was long.  Yet we got a good parking spot and took our place at the end of the line, outside the door.  I told Ellie if she wanted to she could bring her phone in with her to keep her occupied, as I knew we'd have a long wait.  The line moved steadily along as all the windows were manned for this busy time.  And the best part for both of us was the woman ahead of us in line.  We chatted about the line moving quickly, the last minute gifts we were sending to parents and kids.  When she shared she was a teacher, I wasn't at all surprised.

She teaches Jr High at a nearby school, although lives in Wylie too.  She was a joy, and we were so happy to get to spend part of our morning with her!
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Grateful each day

When I asked Ellie if she's been finding miracles she said, "that's really hard Mommy!"  To which I asked, 'is finding them hard? or remembering to look for them hard?"  Of course you know her answer was, 'both!"

This Christmas season has been one of unexpected connections which appears like a miracle of sorts. The only way to recognize them it to look for them.  I'll continue to look for those moments, and help Ellie see them along the way as well.

#BestNine2016

What do you do with a request to find your best memories in the form of photos in one minute?  You do the best you're able to do.

When I started flipping through the photos to choose from I realized there was a theme.  People I love and enjoying what I have.

Bill
Ellie
The Cubs
Coffee
Blue Bell
Photo Op with an Exec I admire
New haircut
Holidays
and Homecoming

I believe I did pretty well.  This is a challenge I may take into next year.  Once a month reflect back and celebrate on my best nine.  Could be photos, could be moments, could be results, could be meetings, phone calls, emails, cards, letters.  Here's the really cool part - mine can be whatever I want it to be in order to recall, reflect and celebrate.

If you choose to, yours can be exactly what you want it to be too!

Team Photo Day

Wednesday was a team meeting.  We planned to meet at 1pm by the Christmas tree in the lobby for a team photo.  As you can see it went off without a hitch.  

There were:

Color-coordinated outfits

A Selfie stick

Many retakes

A random photo of the floor

A very entertained receptionist

Smiling faces

and

Lots and lots of laughter!

Meet my team!

From the left - Alberto, Jude, Rick, Liz, Matt & Alyssa

We made Christmas Cards to hand out to our entire leadership team - using the photo above, not below.  Beauty of this time of year is that I could upload the photo and have cards ready for me the next day to pick up at CVS.

Merry Christmas!

Beauty

Beauty of the season.

For many years, 'the season' has been a flurry of planning and execution in order to plan, shop, wrap, send and put away in order to have 'celebrated.'  The process can be exhausted, frustrated and often disappointing.  

This year is different.

Perhaps its the intention set before the big kickoff.  Perhaps its about having expectations that were more aligned to reality than fantasy.  More likely it was seeking each day this month to find extraordinary in the every day.  When you look for the good, you will find the good.

I recently provided a Q&A session to a morning team of mine.  We called it "Juice with Jude," where we offered 30 minutes to come to a break area with comfy furniture and a drink cart offering water and juices.  They chose the questions, anything goes.

Usually when the group needs a prompt, I begin with my State Farm story.  How long I've been with the company, what department and location I started in and where my career has taken me so far.  Add in a couple random facts like Bill was a State Farm employee first and how we have weaved our two careers together, then mention Ellie and all her activities.  This is a pretty good amount of information for a group to find something to ask a question.

This group sure did.  How long have you been married?  What does your husband do?  What do you do to relax when you're not at work?  What regrets to you have?  What was your major in college?  How come it's not an insurance degree?  What's your favorite thing to bake?  And my favorite, give us one piece of advice.

This one came in this format.  "Jude, you're known for giving good motivational advice, what can you leave us with today?"

Wow.  First, I didn't realize that's what I'm 'known' for ... I'd better think carefully before I speak from now on.  Secondly, what could I say on a moment's notice that might be interesting, motivational or at least not disappointing to a group of eager employees?

Here's what I told them.

"Your thoughts, words and actions all matter.  Begin by focusing on positive thoughts because they become your words, which lead to your actions.  And whatever you are, be a good one."  I gave credit to Abe Lincoln for the last sentence.  

Here's to creating a season that began with seeking miracles.

Giving Season

As Christmas miracles has been my focus this month, I've found opportunities to brighten days, create smiles and share the Christmas spirit.  Its a wonderful feeling to give without a reciprocal expectation.  Truly to let someone know that they matter.

With any action, there is an equal reaction.  The reaction of giving is receiving.  If you are a good giver, you must also be a good receiver.  Move over wrapping paper, bring out the thank you cards.

Grateful.

Each day brings a different person that has sent me a message, left a gift on my desk or shared a story with me of how I mattered to them this year.  It has been humbling and greatly fulfilling.

On the day that I received an incredibly thoughtful gift and heartfelt card from my soul sister in Atlanta, Ellie presented me this quote.  Each day has been like a prayer as she has randomly chosen which one to share with me.  Although by now, we all know there is nothing random about it.

Amen.

3rd Sunday of Advent - the pink candle

Today at mass Ellie wanted to know why the pink candle comes at the 3rd week of Advent.  Honestly, I didn't have a good answer for that question.  Later in the day I said,' let's go look that up," she already had!  She showed me the response.

"Why is there One Pink Advent Candle? 

"In our Advent Wreath, three candles are purple and one is pink. Why the one pink candle?"

In the earliest years of the church the only church season was Lent, the seven weeks prior to Easter. Lent was a season of fasting and prayer as the church commemorated the crucifixion of Jesus. The traditional color of banners in the church during this time was a deep purple, signifying royalty, repentance, and suffering. During Lent the church lit seven candles, one for each week of the solemn season. However solemn the season, the story of Lent also has a twinge of hope and joy since the death of Christ prefigured the resurrection. So, on the third Sunday of Lent, the church was encouraged not to fast, but to feast. In ancient times on this particular Sunday the Pope would honor a citizen with a pink rose, and as time passed the priests wore pink vestments on this day as a reminder of the coming joy.

When the season of Advent was instituted the church viewed it as a mini-Lent, a time for reflection and repentance (thus the purple). In so doing, the church adopted the first four candles of Lent and changed the third candle of Advent to pink in honor of the Lenten tradition. This is why we have a pink candle in our Advent Wreaths. 

To further heighten the sense of anticipation of Christ's coming during Advent, the church named each candle in the wreath -- the first being hope, the second peace, the third joy, and the fourth love (there are a number of other traditional names as well, though these are some of the most ancient). It has always seemed fitting to me that the pink candle is the candle of joy, the one that speaks to us with its twinge of color.

Incredibly fitting as she'd given me this drawing earlier in the day.  When I asked her what it meant to her she said, "not to leave any one or any color out, use them all!"  I loved her response, as i had thought of something different altogether.  I'm so glad I asked her what it meant to her first before sharing what it meant to me!

Texas Treasures and Blue Bonnets

Recently I commissioned my mother to paint a Texas scene for two co-workers that had recently bought houses.  I wanted to give them something that helped root them in Texas and made their house a home.

This rendering of the Texas Hill Country with the familiar blue bonnets was the perfect gift for them.

On my mother's birthday today, December 10th, here's to making a house a home!

Advent

Each evening after dinner, homework and shower Ellie asks if it's time for the Advent calendar.  We move to the couch and she opens her book to read the story that corresponds with the date.  After she tells her story, I open my book and read scripture for the day to her.  Connecting the children's version of a bible story to the verse dedicated to that day in my book.

It's become a very calming ritual for us.  Bill shares the couch with us, listens to the story and smiles while Ellie reads.  Her voice is confident, her vocabulary is wide and most of all her heart and mind open to the stories and the time we created as a family.

We've also found that reading through the Christmas scrapbook of each year Bill and I have celebrated over the last fifteen years is a fun adventure for her too.  She loves the stories and photos from when she was a baby, when Jack was in the Christmas photo and how she's changed over the years.

Isn't that what Christmas is for .. the magic, the wonder.  And this is what Advent is for .. the preparation, the patience and the belief that there is a wondrous light yet to come.

Dinner with friends

Matt, Debbi, me, Jen, Cristal and Steve
Steve & Debbi live in PHX and when they visit we ALWAYS go to the Bavarian Grill!

Sometimes things just get easier.  We don't loosen a knob, or help break something loose - it just happens.  Although it is afterward that the realization happens.  It's been a year full of ups and down at work.  Plenty learned, wounds that are still healing and a cautious optimism of what may be to come.

So on that we break bread.  In our case it was pretzel rolls .. large steins of German beer and potato pancakes.  We threw in a platter of bratwurst and sausage with dark mustard and snitzel - it was quite a feast.  Isn't that where the best things happen - over a meal, sharing a toast, breaking bread with words of kindness and friendship.

And that's just what we did .... minus the beer for me :-)