May 31 - So very grateful

What a great way to cap a month long celebration of turning 50!

Lots of preparation throughout the month, a weekend long party with family and the day with friends at work on the actual day.

Here's what I've learned:

You can't make everyone happy.  Focus on the ones that are important to you.
Tell people they matter - because you won't always have that opportunity.
Say 'no' when appropriate, say 'yes' when you mean it.
Laughter creates an awesome energy.
A small, loyal circle of trust is an amazing force, respite and comfort when you need it.
When no one in that circle is available to talk it out - you're strong enough to get through.
Everyone should have a 'person' who understands them just by the look on their face.
A child's discovery of goodness in the world is your best opportunity to renew your own belief.
Saying a prayer in a quiet moment really matters.
Trust your gut.  Enough said.
People can make your day, and they can also break your day.
You get to choose.
Kindness matters.
When you don't know what to do:  breathe in, breathe out.
In the end it turns out exactly they way it was supposed to.
A word of encouragement at the end of the day can make all the difference.
Be that person for someone else.
Believe in what's possible.
Manage your expectations of others.
When you really don't know what to say in response try, 'well, isn't that interesting....'
Have fun, enjoy the journey and most of all ... know that you really do matter!!

May 30 - Trust the Journey

This entire month has been a journey.  One that culminates after 30 days on May 31st.  Milestone birthday as we're lovingly referring to it.

To celebrate and recognize it I've used each day this month to choose a word to live by that day.  And some days I had the most appropriate word.  As I look back I truly needed, 'listen' or 'breathe' on those days.  And on other days it was 'wonder', 'trust' or 'believe' that made it's mark.  I've enjoyed the process and believe it helped me focus .. and spoke to my quick-moving mind by changing the word each day.

Truth be told I've enjoyed the process.  The discipline of it.  The focus of using that word to its full advantage during my day.  Now comes the question, what will this look like moving forward?  And isn't that always the question.  What tomorrow brings.  Did I learn enough already to take on what's in front of me?

I have if I trust the journey ...

I watched an awesome video recently featuring Rob Bell.

It was a great reminder that if we choose, we are all .. just getting started.  What if I am just getting started?  Wow, that's pretty powerful!  What if the days ahead of me will allow me to use all the lessons I've gained from the days behind me?

I'm Jude, nearly 50 years old (tomorrow!), and I'm just ... getting ... started!

Here's how we ENJOY LIFE!

Here's the seafood boil!

Crab legs, crayfish, shrimp, potatoes, sausage and corn!

It wouldn't be a visit without Ellie and her games - playing BananaGrams with Aunt Di

The gang's all here!

A money tree with 50 $1 bills attached set the tone for the '50' theme!

May 29 - Enjoy Today

Today we will celebrate my birthday ... because its the three-day weekend and there's time to enjoy.  Bill and Ellie have all kinds of festivities planned - to include Aunt Di and Uncle Bruce - without me having to leave the house.

They'll be a great big seafood boil .. in the backyard!  Shrimp, crab and crayfish - with red potatoes, corn and sausage.  I know it will be the real deal since Bill has planned for brown paper to cover the kitchen table in preparation for the food arriving at the table!

May 28 - Fun

Who doesn't need more fun?

We all do.

And today is the official first day of the first weekend of Summer!  How can that not be fun!  AND it is also the beginning of my birthday WEEKEND ... oh boy!

What's more fun than planning for family to arrive, activities for us to enjoy and anticipation of the entire thing!

Fun certainly can be defined many ways depending who you ask.  Some believe fun is lots of people - noise, food, drink and chaos.  Others believe fun is quiet laughter shared between two people.  Doesn't matter how you define it - as long as you participate in it.  As often as possible.

Today is about fun.  Laughter, food, drink and adventure are optional.

This how we have fun!

Fort Worth Stock Yards is like stepping back into the Old West!

Lunch at H3 involved a seat at the bar - on a saddle!

And this is how we fix the BBQ

Ellie as the photographer - drinks at lunch

Somehow we had matching shirts on!

Bill drinking the local brew - Buffalo Butt!

Here's how we do it in Texas - or at least in Fort Worth!

Uncle Bruce gained a new friend that sits a top his head!

And how we ride a Long Horn!

Couldn't ask for a cuter kid to enjoy the day with ....

And a StageCoach ride to end the day!

May 27 - Home

There is NO place like home.

Home sweet home.

No matter where we live, home is a welcome place to return.  That is where my family resides - and waits for me!

Friday is a day off from working last Saturday.  So today is preparing for family to arrive tomorrow.  A bit of puttering around the house, lingering over coffee, reading a book I began on the plane and truly just enjoying being HOME!

May 26 - Connection

Connection.

This is why we were put on this earth.  To connect.  With one another.

Thursday was all about connection.  In fact my entire week in Bloomington was about connection.

I had dinner with Erica, coffee with Mandy and lunch with my dear friend, KB, who although ailing from his illness was in fine spirits with a spring in his step as we met on Thursday!

Pictured above is Erica and I at dinner on Wednesday evening at Baxter's.  We connect each time we're in the same place.  Her sister lives in Dallas, and work brings her here occasionally as well.  So we use those times to make sure - even for 10 minutes - to find one another!

This was really special.  It was my birthday dinner celebration with her.  One of my soul sisters.  I have two you see, and she is one!

I've referred to the post-it above my desk at work with 'me' in the middle and the initials of those in my circle of trust around me.  "EL" is Erica and she is amazing!

We talked husbands (Chris and Bill were friends before we were!), kids (CJ & Mia are a welcome site to Ellie when we gather the families, and work - of course!

So happy to be able to connect with those people still so important to me that live in Bloomington!

May 25 - Energy

Energy.

Not the kind that is generated by a windmill, yet the photo is fitting because I was in the wonderful, friendly mid-west when my word of the day was energy.

After all the ideation of Tuesday, came the presentation on Wednesday!  And bring your passion and energy to that phase we were told.

And so there it was - an opportunity so show energy, enthusiasm and passion for our topic.  In front of a panel, affectionately referred to as our 'shark tank'!

I partnered with a younger, striving to get-ahead male counterpart named, Ethan.  And with a generous spirit and enthusiasm to support our idea we co-presented.  In the end we were not chose as the winning idea.  Although the group I worked with to develop and support was the best part.  My group of Neal, Doug and Ethan were a winning combination.  Although we didn't take home the stack of cash offered up by our Shark Tank investors, we felt like winners in the end!

And that is a different kind of energy!

May 24 - Innovate

Today was about innovation.

In fact it was also about ideation.

The challenge is how to incorporate those ways into other areas that are not part of the work environment.  Several exercises today allowed the group to move through idea blocks - encouraged participation - and required creativity.

And lots of post-it notes.

Which is great, because i love post-its, and sharpies.

How to allow that creativity to seep into other areas - menu planning, adventure development and even relaxation.

May 23 - Anticipation

When I found out I was traveling to Bloomington for several days earlier in the week, the anticipation began.  There is a sense of going home for me when I make the trip there.  It is filled with friends who have supported and cheered me on throughout my journey.

There is also someone who lives there that means the world to me.  His health is not the best these days, but there's hope and potential treatments.  During his visit to Dallas this winter I was only able to speak to him on the phone.  And when we last talked I said, "Next time I'll come to you!"  And he asked, "do you have a trip to Bloomington planned?"  When I answered, 'no, but anything is possible," he responded, 'well if I know you - you'll make that happen!"

And here it is.  I put it out to the universe that I wanted to travel there - if only for a few days - and today I'm off ...

I anticipate seeing old friends.  I anticipate airports, hotels, rental cars and busy travelers.  And now apparently, I'll also need to anticipate long lines at TSA ...

So I'll equip myself with reading material and patience so for the trip.  And in anticipation of seeing someone that means the world, I know this will be a wonderful experience!

May 22 - Rest

Today is a day of rest.

Knowing what's ahead this coming week, I choose today to rest.

Isn't that what Sunday is for?  A day of rest.

And that provides space and time to collect oneself, nap, nourish and embrace the stillness.

Rest.  I'm thinking I just don't do enough of this.

Today, I rest.

May 21 - Be

Today all I could come up with is to .. be.  It's been a busy week of putting plans in place to be away from home and out of the office next week traveling to Bloomington.  And yet I have one more day - Saturday - to get through at work.

And this morning I awoke with a lovely head cold.  I had a massage yesterday and during it I could feel my sinuses open up and begin to drain.  Which, at the time, I thought was a good thing.  And maybe it really is .. but this morning my ears ache, my throat is sore and my nose is running!

Today I will just be.

I will do the best I can, for as long as I can at the office.

And I will stop for C-Boost juice on the way in as well.  Kleenex, orange juice and Tylenol will accompany me on my journey today.  I won't do too much.  I will just be...

May 20 - Reflect

Today I need to have a difficult conversation.  A moment of letdown to be unveiled, and hopefully how to repair and move on.

I chose the word reflect because of its grace and calmness.

If I could reflect first, decide the intention of the conversation and how I wanted the words to be received I'd be more successful.  I wouldn't make up the end of the story in my head, but decide to reflect back on how these conversations had gone in the past.

Reflect is to take a moment.  Take a breath.  The definition says to think deeply or carefully about.

Reflection is a gift.  It allows you to take stock of past events - sorting through what to keep, what to discard.  And it also allows grace in the middle to arrive.

Reflect.

May 19 - Perspective

Perspective.

Having new eyes.

Perspective is a choice.  In order to have perspective, or apply perspective to a situation you must decide to see it from another angle, another point of view.  Sometimes this poses a challenge.  If we always do things a certain way, we will get what we always have ... cannot expect things to be different without doing something different.

That begins by imagining it can be different.  Changing your perspective.  It all begins in how we think about it, and then comes how we act because of that perspective.

Today I will consider place perspective between what the current state is, and what is possible.   That openness may allow something new to form ... a light to shine in a place it hasn't before.

Perspective.

May 18 - Kindness (matters)

Kindness matters.

It really does.

Mostly that we're kind to ourselves, and of course to someone else.  When we begin with ourselves we know what that feels like and then we're likely to show kindness to others.

I say all the time at work, 'kindness matters,' so that those around me hear it.  And when I experience a moment of kindness it reinforces all those messages.

Kindness doesn't need to be a big gift it can truly be a small gesture.  A thank you.  A smile.  A hug when you need one.  Extended a hand to another.  Remembering someone kindly counts too.  And truly if that's where you need to begin - do that.

Kind thoughts are the beginning of creating a community of kindness.  Keep expanding your circle.

Today I will practice kindness.  First with myself, and kind thoughts and actions throughout the day.

Kindness matters, it really does!

Austin Field Trip

This is the WHOLE 4th grade from Whitt at the Capitol Building in Austin!

Aubrie and Ellie on the bus ready to have some fun!

Capitol shot in the misty rain as we began our day!

Rain has cleared and we're between Capital Building and lunch before the museum.

May 17 - Wonder

Today I will be on the lookout for the presence of wonder.

When I wonder, I remain still and open to the possibility.  That will help today as I'm chaperoning Ellie's 4th grade field trip to Austin!

I'll have 10 4th graders all wearing the same color t-shirt as me.  That means I'm responsible for them.  Hmmm, I wonder how that will go?

Well, we'll have 4 hours either way on the bus, and I can't lose them on the bus, can I?  Of course not!  And then there's the state capitol, walking to the park for lunch and then on to the museum!

Oh the fun we'll have today - wandering and wondering!

Having fun!

Here's a shot of Ellie and I during Muffins with Mom last week. What a cute shot that the mom across the lunch (breakfast) table from us took.  She had four kids with her - twin boys in 4th grade - Parker and Reilly, Landon is 4 and a beautiful little girl named Alyssa who looked like she was just over a year old.  Gorgeous, polite children that were so happy to be eating their breakfast together.

We're counting down the days left to elementary school.  Hard to believe that this gorgeous girl pictured with me above will be in middle school in a few months.

A wise parent once told me, 'the days may seem to pass slowly, but the years fly by!"  And I can attest to that.

Field Day

When I was in elementary school we called it Blue and White Day.  And I still have visions of Billy Yeager and I running the three-legged race and being called King and Queen of the grade.  Fast forward forty-something years later.  Billy (now Bill) and his wife, Shannon have a 10-year old son, Gavin and he's the spitting image of his dad at his age.  And Ellie is participating in her own Field Day at Whitt.

Here she's pictured with Mrs. Freeman and several of her friends as they ready themselves for all the events!  Ellie ran in both the 50 meter and the 100 meter dash.

She finished first in both races!

I know!  Our little girl who said she doesn't like to run!  Well, look what happens when you want to win.

Cannot wait to see those finisher ribbons!  They will arrive after the school field trip this week.

May 16 - Believe

Sometimes you just have to believe.  Above all else.  That you'll be able to accept what you're shown, what you've given, what you hear and what it is.

Believe in the best.  Believe in others.  Believe in yourself.

Believe that you'll be given the strength to handle the reality of the situation.

Days are sometimes hard.  Long, tiring, and full of challenge.  And if you chose to believe those are put in front of you to remind you of your strength, courage and perseverance - you'll believe in the outcome.

Believing is letting go.  Letting the universe, God and nature take it's course.  Believing in the outcome without controlling it can be a challenge - and yet that's the beauty of this entire journey.

Today I believe that what's meant to be will happen.

May 15 - Trust

Trust.

A small, yet powerful word.

We trust ourselves.  We trust one another.  We trust that all will turn out alright.

These next weeks are full of so many plans, hopes, wishes, huge efforts, and extreme vulnerability.

Yes, we have our trip involving so many moving parts - with Ellie staying in New York as we fly to Europe.  That in and of itself should be enough  to think about and trust all will be alright.

And yet, there are several other things over the next few weeks that I focus on trusting the outcome will bring joy, health and good fortune as well.

A friend prepares for an interview.  One that has quite a bit riding on it's success.  A leap of faith.  Believing and trusting the process that a positive outcome will be achieved.

Another undergoes treatment for an illness that could bring great relief.  More prayers, faith and hope for a healthy recovery.  And that long sought relief and health restored in the process.

I trust that as all of this unfolds that there will be joy, laughter, celebration and gratitude!  And even if there are bumps in the road, I trust I'll know how to handle those as well.

Saturday's Adventure

Today Ellie wanted sushi for lunch.  In fact, she knew where she wanted to go, without ever having been there before.  She's just that good.

She told Bill she wanted to go to Tokyo Joe's for lunch to have sushi.  He asked her where that was and she said, 'don't you remember it's next to Torchey's Tacos?"  Which is near work, not near our house.  So off we went.

We enjoyed our new sushi place - which was quiet and featured lots of 80's music.  A strange combination, but the sushi was great!  And you can see it made Ellie pretty happy.

And that's a good adventure if you ask me!

May 14 - Adventure

Today is about adventure.

Adventures begin in your mind.  And then you might make a move in order to get there.  We used to call every weekend an adventure when we first moved.  And when I say first moved, I mean moved from New York.  That's just about 7 years ago.  Hard to believe some days.

Each weekend we'd set out to find something new to discover.  It was an adventure.  Ellie was 3 years old at the time.  It didn't matter if it was a farm stand, a furniture store or a new dry cleaner to her.  IT was new and exciting - and we were doing it together for the first time.

She and I will have our own adventure this coming week when we take a school field trip to the state capital of Austin, TX!

Until then, today we'll see what we can find ....

May 13 - Curious

Curious.

Interested.

Open.

Curious is one of those words that allows possibilities to come out.  Less driven, more choices.  And when we allow all those things to come forward, we relax and enjoy what happens.

Having a plan is great.  Most of the time.  And yet there are times that we must remain open and curious to what is possible.

I've learned in my coaching at work that the best place to approach things is to be curious.  It allows for questions and discussion and clarity.  Which is often necessary, even when we believe we know the answers.  And the times that remaining curious allows something else to unfold is wonderful.

That is true in life.  If we have everything all mapped out, we are sure to be disappointed at some point along the way.  It leads to expectations and accountability.

Curious leads to discovery.

Today I will discover new things, new ideas and new paths.

May 12 - Prayer

Sometimes all you can do is pray.

Prayer is defined as a request for help or an expression of thanks.  Sometimes they are one in the same.  And often my prayer is just to guide me through what's to come.  Stressful times, important meetings, travel, events, and most often for people.

There's someone important to me who is challenged by a health issue and during our last phone call he said, just send me good thoughts.  And to me that's a prayer.  A prayer of health, of peace and of acceptance to what's been given to us.

Today's word is prayer to remind me that this is not in our hands, but in God's.  And  he never gives us more than we can handle.

My prayer today is for strength and kindness.  For my friend.  To endure what he's been dealt.

Sending good thoughts and enduring prayers of thanks.

Amen.

May 11 - Present

Present.

That was much of the subject of Liz Gilbert's talk last evening.  How can you enjoy what you have now, if you're not enjoying it while it's happening?

Makes sense, right?

How do we ensure we really are enjoying the people we are with, the experience we are having and the surroundings we're in unless we recognize them, and appreciate them while we're in them.

It's not about creating memories just so you can look back.  It's about enjoying the sights, sounds, people, feelings of everything that we have - while we're having them.

Present.

Be present, in the present.  Because that's the gift!

May 10 - Bold

Today I see Liz Gilbert.  It was one of the courageous things I'm doing this month to honor my birthday.  When I saw she was going to be in Dallas, I knew I was going to be in the audience.  And then I began to think about how to make that happen.

Should I put it out there to all my Dallas friends that I was planning a night out to go see Liz speak?  Or should I find someone I knew who loved her and couldn't say no to a night out?

To take bold action.

Bold is defined as ability to take courageous and daring action to achieve results.

And then it came to me.  The night we were at Jeanine and Michael's with Ellie in the pool.  As the guys talked work on the other side of the pool, Jeanine and I chatted about family, free time and how we were glad we were both living in the same place again - 6 years after we first met in Charlottesville.

When the conversation turned to my birthday and where the four of us could go for dinner to celebrate on weekend in May, I asked her if she was interested in going with me.  She didn't know much about Liz Gilbert, other than hearing of Eat, Pray, Love - but she was game.  A bold move was made!

May 9 - Faith

Sometimes you hold on because you have faith.  Sometimes you have faith because of the times you've held on.  Having faith takes a commitment.  To knowing that what is meant to be, will happen.   And sometimes we're disappointed.  Yet we know that we have faith that this was meant to be.

Funny how that works isn't it?

Right now I have faith.  Faith that the right decision will be made by those with the decision to make.  And faith in the person with whom the decision will be made for.

Faith takes years of believing.  Faith in things well out of our control.  Faith in things we can't see or touch.  Faith in people, faith in decisions, faith in organizations that we're a part of.

So I'll say a prayer.  Close my eyes.  Believe in the intended outcome.  And know that in the end the only thing I can do is have faith.

May 8th - Family

Today is Mother's Day.  And that's all about family.  Family that raised you, and family that you created.  We spent the day grateful for the sacrifices and love that the mothers around the world made and showed us.

Family is also the friends you were born to connect with along the way.  Those are the ones that we choose to be by our side - through it all.

In our case, living in Virginia, Illinois and now Texas we've created a family for ourselves in each location.  Those are the ones you celebrate with and you lean on.  The ones that you call when you have to share and also when you need a hand.

Family takes on many different forms.  And in the end, does it really matter?  We're here for one another through the good and the not so good.  And when it's not so good, these are the ones that make it better!

So glad for my family, and for the ones I choose to be my 'family'.

Saturday in May

Today was a gorgeous, sunny day in Dallas.  So we decided to get out and get in that sunshine before more severe storms find their way to us tomorrow and Monday.  There was a classic car show at the Sachse High School so we went for a walk through the cars.  Although I liked the classic Mustangs and Bill liked the Corvettes, Ellie reserved the right to pick this '57 Thunderbird as her favorite!

It almost looks like we must be near the ocean wit the breeze, the sunshine and the convertibles!  We had fun finding the Schuler's there too.  Jamy was displaying his new shiny red Corvette too!  So we spent time with Dawn, Robin and Lincoln while the guys talked cars.

And this afternoon we prepared for the Derby.  We had tried to invite friends, Charlie and Abby over for some Derby celebration, but they had tickets to the Paul Simon concert to we decided just to go it alone.  Some snacks and these Mint Julips were the way we celebrated today!